Buhay ang maganda.

How can I express the depth of my gratitude for being here? Every time I see the kids drop their peso's in the offering basket, I tear up. When they're singing, I close my eyes and just listen. I know the words, and I like to sing along, but sometimes just hearing them is so much better. And when we pray, I don't keep my eyes shut! I open them so I can watch their precious little faces all scrunched up in focus and in passion. Sometimes I have to stop and look around me, and think, "I'm really here." And my heart overflows with thankfulness to God. Not just here in the Philippines, but here, in life. How easily I forget what's been done for me, what's been given to me! Truly, what more could I ask for??

I'm alone at the church now, it's about 7 pm. Tonight's ministry is at East Ave, and only 4 people can go each week. I get a little lonely sometimes being here alone in the evenings, but tonight it's actually really nice. This is good time for me to reflect and refocus.

It's been a week since I last wrote, there have been some funny things that happened! I was helping to cook lunch last sunday, and of course, while I stirred I was humming. Well, apparently there's a Filipino superstition that if a woman sings while she cooks, she will never get married. Ha! Then again, only the next day I was eating lunch with the other teachers. As per usual, I was the last one to finish. (If you know me well, you know I'm an extremely slow eater.) So Ate Monz informs me that I have to turn my plate! "Why?" I asked. "Because, if you're the last person eating at the table, you will never get married! But there's a way to reverse it! You must turn your plate around." She's joking of course, but I play along. I can't tell you how many times I've spinned my plate this past week haha. It seems I'm hopeless!

A couple of the guys are helping me put a poem of mine to music. It's something I wrote five years ago. Since I never intended it to be a song, it's not structured to be one at all, so it's been a little bit of a challenge. I mean, I didn't even have a tune in mind! But we sit down, and one of them plays different chords and patterns, and I try and sing along. It's really different. At one time I could say, "I'm a writer, not a musician." But now I can't claim either! I've tried writing again but it just won't flow. Anyway, the song writing process proves to be interesting. I've also picked up the guitar again, which feels good. This is a great place to improve my playing and learn some songs, since so many people here at the church are musically gifted.

Today Martha and I went to the mall to buy an aerobics DVD :) last week after prayer meeting, Mona and I were chatting about exercise, and came up with the idea to do a girls only aerobics group! So we start tomorrow! Martha and I picked a Latin dance disc haha. I've previewed it already, and I think it's going to be really fun!! I'm super excited.

I have so many questions about my future. I really don't know what's next, and I struggle with having the faith that my tomorrows are already known by God, and I need only trust that He's going to get me there safe and well. But right now, I'm sitting in front of a fan, typing at the round table in the church, listening to cars and motorcycles drive by, occasionally honking their horns. Except for Argie's brother and Jonell, I'm the only one here. It's quiet inside, and I just feel a perfect peace. In this moment, I have no confusion. None, whatsoever. Yes, I still have questions. But right now, I know that I'm where I'm meant to be. And I feel right.

a day to enjoy beauty.

I had a wonderful day :)

Teaching was a pleasure, as always. For a change of scenery I brought both my classes to the church to read. They like it better because they can sit on the floor and get closer to the pictures... plus sitting in a desk isn't very comfortable, and you always want to be comfortable to hear a story! I don't know if I mentioned it before, but the church provides snack and lunch for the students and teachers. We had lunch, and I checked the notebooks of my grade 3 class to make sure they were copying everything down properly. Then I got a text from Ate Treesa, asking me if I'd be up for a trip to an art museum! Even though today is tuesday, and we usually go to Bagong Silang squatter village, I had no plans because the Korean Pastor Khan went back to Korea for a few weeks. So of course I said I'd love to come!

She picked me up just after 3:00 and we we drove straight to this stunning garden/museum called Pinto Art Museum. It's a private place, owned by a neurologist who practices in Makati. I guess he just has a huge passion for art, so two years ago he began building up this beautiful property where he could invite artists to come and enjoy a peaceful environment to be inspired. He succeeded! It's absolutely inspiring. The architecture is original and so.. 'other worldly'. Everywhere you look are angles and shapes, sculptures, lush gardens.. (the whole place is essentially build out of the jungle mountainside!) And then when you go inside, you see many different studios and displays for artwork. They even have a cafe in one garden, and in a separate garden, they have a restaurant and about than ten tables for patrons, so it's very intimate and quiet. The whole point is a serene environment and I really, thoroughly enjoyed it.

We went to go visit her best friend Linda after we left the museum. Linda works with the Zion bible school, a seminary that's moved locations a couple times. But they've just finished building their new school, and it's GORGEOUS! It was so nice, I thought maybe I'd like to become a pastor, just so I could attend haha. The whole place, including Lisa's house is build at the very top of a mountain, so you can look out over all of Manila and even out into the bay. Unfortunately it was a little foggy today so we couldn't see everything clearly, but I could see the bay and the water past the city.. so beautiful. After that we rushed back to Treesa's house for dinner with a lovely couple who just came back from Israel! They are Americans, the husband Scott runs a medical clinic in Antipolo (?) and his wife Cindy is a teacher. Chatting with his wife was really cool, she really seemed to understand my heart and why I didn't go to college right away, and why I'm here. She told me about the direction the clinic is going in- she has dreams and prayers to start a school. She and a couple of the ladies she disciples are already tutoring some students in a sort of summer school. It's really exciting to hear how God is supplying the resources for the needs that she sees in her midst. I'm blessed so much to talk with these different missionaries here who are really living the life that I've dreamed of... It's real for them, it's every day! I'm gaining insight and so much appreciation for them and for how difficult, but rewarding the missionary life is here in the Philippines. This is valuable time, and I feel more and more every day that God is teaching me. I don't know if he's preparing me for the challenges I'll face in my future as a missionary here, or if He's letting me know that I should continue seeking His will elsewhere. All I know, is that this is a time of seeking and finding, reaching and receiving, asking and listening. Something important is happening here in me personally, I can feel it.

After dinner, Treesa, her son Drew, her dog Oreo and I drove to the water tower in her subdivision and we climbed it! It was SO FUN! I think the first level was 70 feet, then we climbed to the very top, where we could stand on top, that must have been 80 to 90 feet! Oh my gosh, I loved it! If it had been daytime, we would have seen way into the mountains, but since it was night we could only see their shadows, and all the city traffic and lights. Still, super cool. I'd like to go back some time when the sun is shining :)

It was 31 degrees today, but felt hotter. The humidity was only 70%, which isn't really that high here. I think it was just the effect of the sun. It's a completely different sun from the one we see in Canada, in case you were wondering. I don't know how my mom is going to react to the heat haha. I hope she makes it out of here okay!!!

I am officially a Newhopian!

It has been such an exciting week already, and it's only tuesday! Life here is so wonderful.. God is so good to me.

I got my key to the church and the gate the other day, making me one of only a handful- something I'm very proud of. I know it's just a key, but to me it symbolizes this place being my home. That's why I say, I'm now officially a Newhopian! This morning after my first class I also received my teacher's uniform, which makes me feel like an official teacher! I'm so pleased. The shirts are a bit big for me, they were actually made for Teacher Jomel, but I think it's better too big than too small (which is usually my problem here haha.)

Yesterday after school I went with Marivic to go look at some clothes down the road and found a lovely pair of shoes for 250 pesos (about 5 bucks). They're an awesome find because I don't even have shoes that nice at home! I really like them. Then Ate Treesa (the white missionary I stayed with for my first 4 days here) picked me up at the church and we went for a massage together :) It was delightful! There was only time for a half hour massage, but it was so relaxing I felt like it could have been an hour. She got on my back and cracked it with her knees! It was awesome! We were at a beautiful spa, but it was really sad to think that within the walls of this spa, everything is bright and lovely and people are pampered, but just outside the walls there's nothing but squatters for miles. The difference is just so drastic, with the vast majority of the population living in that poverty. We went back to the Haus house (ha.) for dinner, and there I met a woman named Holly. She's in her mid-20's, a missionary from the states who taught at Faith Academy here, and is now church planting and discipling young Filipino women. She's obviously very passionate about these people, and I was so impressed by her fluent Tagalog. She's only been here 3 years, but is driving herself around and really finding a way to fit in here as a single white woman, which is not ever easy. So that was really cool to meet her and talk with her.

Richard and I went to the DVD store last night and I bought a disc of 24 great UFC fights, and also a 10 in 1 disc of disney movies. The quality on the 10 in 1's is actually pretty good. And for the price of 2 dollars, it's worth it! The man who runs the shop gave me a special discount, telling Richard in Tagalog that it's because I'm beautiful. Richard looked at him and said, "she understands you." hahahaha. Richard didn't think it was very funny but I was laughing.

So now I'm in between classes, about to start my grade 2 reading class in 40 minutes. I'm getting bored of reading picture books with them every day. Always a different story and different pictures, but essentially it's all the same. I'd like to find them a poem or something different to read. Maybe we can read song lyrics and discuss them. It's harder with the grade 2's because they're still pretty young, but I once had someone suggest to me that it's always better to aim too high and have something go over their heads, than to aim too low and give them nothing to reach for. I like that philosophy.

Oh, before I go, the most exciting part of my week so far was my mom deciding to come visit me here! She and my dad emailed me on saturday night their time to tell me that she was thinking she'd like to come, and to say that they'd found a seat sale with China Air. I phoned them sunday morning to discuss it, and by sunday evening they had bought the ticket! She will be here July 15, for 5 days? Or a week. She'll stay in my room since everything else is being used as classrooms for the school. I'm really excited! I'm so surprised at this risk she's taking, it takes a lot of courage to hop on a plane and fly to the Philippines by yourself! It will be the first time someone from my family will understand what I do here, and subsequently my heart for Filipinos, especially the small ones. Mama Guild is coming to Manila! Unbelievable!

when it rains, it pours.

Yesterday was really crazy. It started off normal, teaching my two reading classes and enjoying snack with the kids. It was raining during class, which I still get excited about, but I had no idea how bad it was going to get!

Eventually, all the students had gone home except four of the grade 2 girls. They live in San Buena and were waiting for the trike to come and pick them up from the church. Since it was already afternoon, we were bagging the rice and soup for our ministry in Gruar. The girls were hanging out waiting, and came over to help me :) we bagged the rice and tied it up together, and I was so blessed to have their assistance. As we bagged, we talked about the book we'd read that day, "What Is Love?" It's so awesome when they remember what we read together. They could recite with me, "Love is... helping, sharing, listening, giving, saying sorry.." etc. So that was great fun. The rain was coming down hard by that time, and we played and laughed and ran around dancing haha. I ran to grab my camera because it was just such a special moment, I didn't want to forget it. Taking pictures is always a popular activity, especially for us girls!!! We posed with umbrellas and in the rain... haha. Then their trike came so we said goodbye and I went to hang out with the youth until we left for Gruar.

Ate Mona received a text message from the mother of one of our students. She warned us that in Gruar the water was already at hip level and flooding. My reaction was excitement! I had never seen a flood in person before. I would compare it to how the Filipino's would feel seeing snow for the first time. Shock, and awe. We packed the food into the pajero and drove over. We were a small group yesterday because most of the youth were stuck at home due to the rain. I could feel the water getting higher and higher underneath the car. I felt like the tires were submerged, haha... so I turned to Marivic and asked, "ARE WE FLOATING?!?!" Which evidently was a really stupid question, because she laughed and smacked me and called me something derogatory in Tagalog hahaha. We stopped, and I had the moment of panic! I was sitting next to the door, and all of a sudden I was nervous for what would happen when I opened the door! Would the water come rushing in?! Again, stupid, but my imagination went away on me lol. Ate Monz asked me to take lots of pictures, because she left her camera with her daughter, Martha. So I assumed the role of photographer and snapped away. I took 93 pictures yesterday. It was incredible. The water was only about half way up my calves but it was shocking anyway. Of course, it wasn't cold, but I quickly realized that in water like this, staying dry is completely impossible, so I began to embrace being drenched!

We couldn't go any farther than the entrance to Gruar, the water was just too deep. So we handed off the crates of food to some of the boys and men to bring in. Argie and Charlie went to help distribute, as well as a few people from the village. It's way too hard for me to describe the scene... men were swimming in the 15 foot deep water where a small creek runs during the dry season, kids were wading over to us to say hi, we were hiding underneath a tiny little shelter at the entrance of the village, and it finally dawns on me that many people's homes are filled with water. This of course, is a serious problem when you have little to call your own as it is. In the squatters, disasters like floods and fire and that much worse, because when you've lost everything you have, where can you begin to rebuild? Resources are maxed out as it is, when times are 'good'. I can see now how disheartening it is for those living in the squatters when the rain falls like this. And apparently this isn't even that bad. I asked Jonell, "so what would you call this, is this a flash flood?" He said, "flash flood?... no... just a regular flood." !!! It's crazy to me. At least this is a flood no one should die in. Mona tells me that Cainta is already at F in the monsoon alphabet. 'Falcon' has already come! 6 monsoons this year already, and we're not even in the thick of rainy season yet! The worst is yet to come- during the months of September- November. It was during September 09 that Manila experienced 'Ondoy', a terrible storm that killed many- including one of our Superkids. The water had filled her home in the squatter village, so she jumped out the window and was swept away.

School was cancelled today in all of Cainta on account of the rain, so I slept in till 11 and then watched a Filipino drama movie with Argie, Richard, Marc Cris and Jonell. The day has been pretty boring, a lot of bumming around and drinking coffee. Argie and I made lunch for the 6 of us at the church. Boiled chicken, sautéed in liver spread and tomato sauce with potatos and veggies. We ate it with rice (of course) but today as a special treat we had garlic rice! Mmm so good. I just pretended there was no liver in the ulam and it was fine haha.

I'm going to walk to the DVD store with Jenneth and some of the boys when I'm done my Tagalog homework for my lessons with Teach. Goodnight, Canada!

A New Hope to Asia, Center for Education.

I almost forgot! How could I forget?

Something I'm really excited about is the vision for our school at the church. We have a preschool class, and grades 1-3. Our teachers are Ate Mona, Ate Beth and her husband Jomel, Ate Marivic (aka Teach), Ate Marilyn, and myself. Marilyn takes the students with special needs, or the ones who need to study in a different way from the other students. I like to watch her and one of her students, April. They write out the alphabet with clay, and take things a little bit slower. I'm always blessed to see the gentle and patient way in which Marilyn works with her.

This school is about more than offering a few grades to the younger kids. There is a long term vision which is so much more. The dream on the hearts of the leadership here, is to educate these kids now, so that they have a good, strong platform with skills in English, and then to help the same kids get into college later on, offering financial assistance if needed. The church already pays for the education of 13 (?) college students. But of course, college education is going to be harder if you haven't had a solid upbringing in school all the way along. "We want to raise up world changers", is what Pastor Ding told me yesterday. Currently, none of the children are sponsored for their schooling, and the budget is getting tighter and tighter. There is an option to sponsor one of the students for 35 dollars a month. It provides for their books, papers, pens and pencils, erasers, sharpeners, snacks at break-time, lunch, and the salary of the teachers. (Myself not included, of course.) Currently we are working on setting up a website where sponsors can check how the students are doing in their classes, and look at pictures and understand exactly what our school is all about. I think it's a great idea, and I'm excited about it. We are walking in faith right now that the students will be sponsored, trusting that God will provide the money. If sponsoring one of the students is something you think you'd like to do, I'm going to ask Ate Mona to compile some specific info for me, and I can share it here. I will also get her email address so you can forward any questions to her :)

hot chicks and sweet rides :P

I would just like to say that I'm the coolest teacher, EVER. I felt so badass driving around on a friends motorcycle, and it only got better when I drove past a students house and he waved me down. When I stopped he just looked at me like I was crazy and said "Teacher Angela... what are you doing...?" Hahaha. So sweet.

Marivic (Teach) was going to be sleeping alone last night at her cousins house, so I invited her to come stay with me and have a sleep over. She didn't have any of her things though, and transportation can be a problem here. (Expensive, and sometimes unpredictable.) Argie recently sold her his motorcycle, but she's not comfortable driving it yet, so I told her I could drive and we'd go get her stuff together! It was so fun... such an adventure! People really look at me with curiosity when I go driving by them. It's a rare sight to see a white girl, let alone a white girl driving a motorcycle. But it was such a good time! Some boys from the church must have been a little hesitant about my abilities, because they showed up at her house a while later, to make sure we'd gotten there okay! I said that I didn't know whether to be pleased that they are so attentive, or offended that they didn't trust me! I proved myself more than capable, and I was very proud :) Sleepovers here are just the same as sleepovers at home. We watched Letters to Juliet, had dinner, chatted late into the night about love (haha) and boys (haha) and eventually fell asleep. Teach is quickly becoming a really special friend of mine. I think the building of relationships is a focus of mine during my stay here. I've already experienced lots of that, and I'm loving it :)

Instead of teaching yesterday, Pastor Ding and I headed downtown to the Immigration offices. It can take a long time to get there and then be processed, so we left at 8:30 am. We had to take the train, then a jeepney, then walk for a ways. It was a really cool time though, because I got a chance to really talk with him and learn more of the way he thinks. He shared with me some stories of his life as a business man, before he became a pastor. I highly value that time I got to spend with him. I was processed within an hour, so round trip we were only about 4 and a half hours. Pretty good time when you live in a city as crowded as Manila! So my visa is extended now until about half way through July... they get so much money from you through these visa extensions.. When you first come into the country you have 21 days. Then, if you extend, you get like, 18 days on top of that. When those 39 days are up you have to renew AGAIN. And it cost me 75 bucks yesterday! When I'm not making any money, that's a heck of a lot to spend all at once.

I'm in between my two classes right now. I have about an hour and a half long break which is nice. I will go eat now so I'm energetic for my grade 2 reading class :)

bring on the rain!

I had a first this weekend! Most sundays I like to make myself a coffee and drink it during the service. Well, the heavens were pouring down rain this sunday, which brought the temperature down. For the first time ever, here in the Philippines, I experienced my coffee going cold on me! It was totally shocking! It's been raining a lot this week, which I love. I take great pleasure in standing outside becoming drenched in the heavy downpour, and according to some friends, this is just a light rain! It's going to get a heck of a lot heavier, so I'm excited to see what that's like :)

Pastor Ding continued his message from last week about prayer. Last week was more specifically on the question of whether lack of prayer is weakness, or sinful. It was so intriguing to me, as I've never even considered it. This week was more about prayer itself. Why do we pray? What happens when we pray? One thing he said that stuck with me was, "you can trace every big thing that God has done, to a prayer." ...which is so mind boggling. If that's true, then it proves that even though God can do whatever he wants, he choses to work with, and through us. He chooses to partner with us. Something I still don't understand... But it's refreshing to hear about prayer- why do we actually pray? God reminded me this past week that because he calls me child, I have a right and privilege to approach him with my requests and petitions. So why should I delay? What could stop me, if he is waiting? An area in my life I really wish to see growth is in my prayer.

Of course, tonight, when I'd really like it to be raining, there's none to be had. Our pipes have been broken since last night so we find ourselves without flushing toilets, tap water, showers, drinking water, everything. If it was raining even a little I'd go outside to brush my teeth! Argie is working on fixing it right now, I hope and pray that he's able to get our water back... We're constantly so hot and sticky- especially during rainy season with so much humidity in the air! You should see what's happening to my hair... If I leave it wet, it curls. But as soon as it dries and I brush it, my head turns into a big fluff ball!

I went to Greenhills today with Lisa, which was so fun! The prices were a little discouraging, not quite as low as we would have liked them to be. Such beautiful clothes... but not for the right price. We couldn't find any tops we liked for less than 200 pesos! Of course, by Canadian standards that's still really cheap- only 4 bucks, but I'm trying to live on a Filipino budget. 200 is not easy to justify spending on a t-shirt. I still managed to get a couple really nice gifts for people at home, a couple scarves, and one shirt. I also got a pair of shoes for church, since the only footwear I've had are my islander sandals, which aren't very classy and don't match my pretty skirts haha.

Tomorrow is back to school. My first class is with the grade 3's. We're starting a book called Danger Ahead, it's a Focus on the Family book. It's not too long, and I think they'll be interested once they get into the plot line. My grade 2 class is so much easier, because I can fill up a whole 50 minutes by reading to them and having them interact with the story as we go along. That class always ends up going by faster, and they're so much more responsive to me than the grade 3's. I don't know why.

I would like to take this opportunity to mention that my dinner tonight was a burger with cheese and egg from one of the shops along the road. I spent a whole 22 peso's on my dinner. Guess how many Canadian dollars that is? ZERO dollars! It's only 50 cents! And it was delicious. Who knew that throwing a fried egg on a cheeseburger would taste so good? Masarap!

Sige po, magandang gabi, pagpalain ka ng Diyos!